Hitting Rock Bottom
By: Sandra Hendricks Jul 11th, 2010Category: Contributor Posts
Image © Nihan Aydin stock.xchng
Most of us have heard the phrase “Hitting Rock Bottom”. Many of us, in fact, have reached that point in our lifetimes. Many of us have hit a low and clawed our way back to the top of our game. Drug and alcohol rehabilitation most frequently utilizes this phrase. In order to overcome our problems, we must conquer blame, excuse and denial. However, before we can recognize that we have a problem, it may be crucial to acknowledge that we have hit rock bottom. We may even have to provide ourselves permission to get to that point in order to help ourselves.
I have hit rock bottom several times throughout my lifetime, and I am sure many of you have too. Those times when sorrow seems to overpower, or self-pity has you in its clutches. Those times when we feel the most helpless to benefit those we love, or ourselves. Those periods when we sense that trying to rectify our circumstances is pointless, and we lose all hope. You understand the feeling. We all have moments when we have that devastating desire to throw in the towel and give up. That feeling that being happy is impossible, and accepting that life is too difficult seems like the solution.
I read a book last year that sprinkled some light on the subject of hitting rock bottom. I cannot remember which publication it was, but if I find it, I will amend this. As I studied the material, a light came on for me. The times that I had come close to a breakthrough in my development, I shut down or backed away. My emotions were powerful and I definitely was unwilling to look for the underlying issue. The stirring pain seemed, tormenting, and I refused to go there; I refused to allow the pain to surface.
What is at the Bottom?
Okay so in the book this author presents this idea. We go through life pushing our emotions down and suppressing them until we feel better. Each time a feeling like anger, insecurity, sadness, fear, guilt, etc. causes us anxiety, we set out to move away from it. We move away looking desperately for some peace and look for the joy that surely must exist. We claw our way back to the top of our game in hopes of feeling something more agreeable. However, the writer explains that by climbing out of the rut we have gotten ourselves into, joy eludes us.
So what is at the bottom through all this suppressing and avoiding? According to this particular author, it is innate joy. He explains that as we journey through life, we experience the sorrow. We press it down, over the top of the joy in our hearts; we dampen our ability to experience happiness. Underneath all our pain remains, the source of pleasure we are seeking. Furthermore, each time we turn away from the heartache we turn from joy. His solution is to accept the rock bottom and dig our way through it, discovering the buried treasures of the heart.
Working Through vs. Working Out
Image © Nihan Aydin stock.xchng
There is a reason that the Gurus advocate that we work THROUGH our issues. Working through suggests that we locate the underlying cause of the issue, rather than attempting to sidestep the feelings. After we dig through to the joy, we can notice when we are trying to suppress more feelings and stop doing that. We can work through issues as they appear, so that our joy is always available to us. In other words, after we encounter the hidden treasure immersed beneath the rubble, we can maintain that joy. We can identify when we are endeavoring to move away from difficulties as they arise. We can ask for help from loved ones that will help us face our troubles. If we will do this, we will not bury them, and allow them to resurface later.
I hope this theory will help you recognize that we need to work through our troubles rather than working them out. We cannot work around what inconveniences us, suppressing unwanted feelings, and hope to stay on top. We cannot succeed if we are in a perpetual movement away from issues that come up. We must work through to the joy that is in our heart and spirit.
Entreat help or seek a professional that can assist you in working through your concerns. Self-help does suggest that you must do the work yourself, but you are not alone. There are many individuals in the universe to help you help yourself. Rock bottom is actually just a flimsy layer of delusion that feels as if you have to use a jackhammer to get through. If you will open up to another, the joy in life will come to the surface.
What are your thoughts on this? Comment now!
Sandra Hendricks, @thisshouldhelp2 on Twitter
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TwitterID: strategyguy
Thanks for the great post! It’s a very powerful topic & really resonates with me..
What is at the Bottom? .. Your inner & raw self! It’s an opportunity to look inward and be honest with yourself as to what got you to where you currently are. That confrontation of self is probably the scariest moment of my entire life. It happened in 2002 and more than courage, it was being able to grasp onto the tools that were made available for me to start climbing back up.
Working Through vs. Working Out.. In this state of raw & brutal honesty, surrounded by true friends holding you accountable, I learned that your present situation (momentary state) is a consequence of your past actions. I learned that actions are the physical expression of thoughts, and in that I learned that I am in sole control of what I transition from thought to action. It’s not easy of course (damn difficult in fact!) and I had to face a lot of demons, but I cautiously took a first step.. and when that was firmly grounded I mustered the courage to take the next, and looking back now.. I realize that is how I learned to run.
In the end, and I don’t mean to trivialize, I learned that life is only 5% of what happens to you.. and 95% of how you react to life.
Thanks for the opportunity to share!
JC
TwitterID: thisshouldhelp2
Hi JC,
I completely agree with you that working through our inner most areas is exasperating. The learning procedure that we experience while penetrating through the wreckage we have created contains grief and sorrow. The worthwhile work is damn difficult as you say, but doable. I am so glad to hear that you have overcome your own negative thinking, and it sounds as if you are on track now. “I learned that life is only 5% of what happens to you.. and 95% of how you react to life.” I like this addition, I think we all discover that truth when the transitions are underway. Thank you for the wonderful comment.
TwitterID: MsTausha
This post is absolutely AWESOME! It is so important for us to face our biggest fear: hurt. You can’t get away from it. You have to get to the point where you actually feel it in order to truly overcome it. Placing it on the back burner does not work, and with all that suppressing you’ll eventually blow! The concept of suppressing innate joy blew my mind, awesome revelation! Thank you for sharing!
TwitterID: tikiprincess
Love the fact u state – that rock bottom is just a flimsy layer of delusion – may i forever remember this – so as not 2 get stuck & frozen with feelings of despair . Love U Keep up the great & fantastic work u r doing. God bless u honey
TwitterID: thisshouldhelp2
Thank you so much Ms. Tausha for your amazing comment and support. I found it astonishing when I read about the concept too.
TwitterID: tonyanders
The harder you fall, the higher you can bounce! The one thing that is paramount in recovering from a “bounce” is to be aware of our attachment to that “bottom” and our “labels” if you will. We are a sum of our “experiences” and not a sum of our “consequences”. Our past deeds musn’t become our present identity.
As with anything that hits bottom, movement in one direction ceases. Usually this is a good thing. Often our bottom, that proverbial “wall”, can be a “Divine detour” telling us a change of direction is needed. Indeed it can be painful; but for some, the lesson learned is in direct proportion to the amount of painful pressure needed to get our attention. Great post and thanks for sharing!
TwitterID: thisshouldhelp2
Hi Tony,
Well said, thank you for adding comprehensibility and for helping define this article! It is wonderful see you here.
TwitterID: mecpublications
i hit rock bottom financially when my daughter was only 10. I was a single mom, without any child support. That summer we were basically living out of the car and in our tent at campgrounds when I could make a few dollars.
And you know, even though we had almost nothing, I sat on the beach one day next to a gorgeous lake where we were camping and I felt the most amazing peace come over me. I watched my daughter poking at the sand looking for bugs or rocks or pretty flowers, completely content. I wrote in my journal and listened to the gulls and waves. Everyone else was at work or rushing about living their crowded busy lives and there I was just being alive.
It’s hard to explain but I was more at peace that day than any day before it. This was one of the times in my life when I experienced pure joy as you describe it. When I finally crawled out of the financial hole and found a place to live I actually was sad to fold up that old tent and sleep indoors. To this day when I want to feel peace, I sleep next to an open window and pretend I’m back in that old tent.
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